Sunday, August 23, 2009
From time to time, troubles keep coming more often than ever. How much more can i take ? Everyday i fake a smile, so that others will not worry for me. But deep down, i know, my handful of close and loved friends know there's something wrong w me. W th recent quarrels, honestly idk how much i can take anymore. From
Estella to Pei xun, what else is life gonna throw at me ? From Love to friends, to life itself. If life has a " I QUIT " button, i would've pressed it long ago. I dont know what's keeping me going on, friends? My loving mom who's passed on? I dont want to live a meaningless life, i guess, that's my only purpose for going on. From th day i was born right up til now, i've yet to do something that's meaningful. That's what i think. "
So, what if I never hold you, yeah, or kiss your lips again? " Quote from Seize the Day by Avenged Sevenfold. For those that have never heard of it, go listen to it. It's a ni
ce song. No
Screamo, dont worry. :) So yeah, what if i never hold you, or kiss your lips again ? This
part is for those whom
I loved, and maybe still love. So what'll happen if i'll never hold you or kiss your lips again ? As much as i want to, i know it's impossible. These three girls whom i loved, could never be
mine.
Yet i keep going on hoping. Hope, dreams and just Hope and dreams. They will NEVER come true. This is from personal experience, those who have their hopes and dreams fulfiled, kudos to you. These few days, i keep listening to songs like Seize the Day, Harder than You know, Ashley, Miserable at Best. I know it isn't helping me one bit , but they really, REALLY describe how i feel. "
Ashley, baby, you make me feel so alive. I've got purpose once again. " Quote from Ashley, by Escape the Fate. So, i'm wondering if this "Ashley" will appear, perhaps she's appeared before, but i overlooked her? I dont know. "
take everything away from me silent angel... " Starting line of This Conversation is Over. Alesana is teh sex. If there was this silent angel, i really hope it'll take everything away from me. Afterall , i've had nothing much to begin w. I've spent 18 years of my life playing, and i'm really sick of playing. What more can i do ? Who will be th one who's willing to guide me. I wonder. I've never hated my dad for not being there as a family man, nor did i hate him for remarrying . He's a man through and through, and men need love. That's th most important thing that i feel i lack. As much as i want someone to guide me now, a family member, i wouldn't ask for my dad. If i could have a wish, i would wish for my mom to still be alive and guide me. Nothing is ever too late, but i've strayed far from th right path alr in my opinion. "
This is the year where hope fails you. The test subjects run the experiment , And the bastards you know is the hero you hate. But cohesion is possible if we try. There's no reason, There's no lesson, No time like the present. Tell me right now, what have you got to lose?What have you got to lose, except your soul? Who's with us? " Slipknot's speech in th starting part of Pulse of the Maggots. Selling your soul, is it worth it? In th end, when we die, we lose all earthly things. I've always said i'd sell my soul for true love, but true love could never be bought, not by money, not by my soul. This option has been knocking on my head for quite a while. Moving to Melbourne. If i do, i'd have a new life, new friends, new challenges, new obstacles. And i'd be able to continue studying. But is that what i really what ? No. I truly treasure my friends, and i'm not willing to leave them behind. It maybe true that as we grow old, we'd lose lots of good friends. Whether to work, or just stop contacting. It's sad, but i guess it's th truth. From th first time i came to Singapore, I've had close brothers backstabbing me, forgetting about me, making a fool out of me . From th time i was in St Gab primary til St Gab secondary, i've never forgotten to invite those whom i've knew since primary school til now whenever i've a party going . Yet i receive word that somethings happenening and i wasn't notified. So much for being brothers? I guess, some people really get to know you only to use you. And when they're done w you, they just throw you aside. Thank you Kat dasao for those words you tagged, really appreciate it. :) I've told myself, certain people, but i keep thinking about them and i cant help myself. Can someone hit me w a car, so i'll forget everything? Amnesia seems like th start of a new life for certain people. Hmm, i guess i'm done for tonight. Feeling better alr i guess. Supposed to meet Poh tomorrow, i dont even know if i can wake up.
Lets finish w a song lyrics aight ? I chose this song for it's title, nothing else. Honestly. :)
Metro Station - Goodnight and Goodbye.
"And you can start by saying sorry,
That would be the best,
would be the first thing to get off your chest.
cuz I know you found someone new
and the saddest part is
he doesn't mean a thing to you.
you'll give him a test,
and leave him like all the rest.
(yeah) nothing but a test,
cuz you know that I'm the best.
baby baby,
goodnight and goodbye to you.
you will talk to me
but I sure won't talk to you.
baby baby,
goodnight and goodbye to you
you will come to see
maybe I was the one for you.
What do you say?
Lets end this song today.
She might be new,
but she is overwhelming compared to you.
But I wish you the best,
I'll bet you regret losing me
after all this stress.
I moved on and so did you
your misery won't bring me down too.
baby baby,
goodnight and goodbye to you.
you will talk to me
but I sure won't talk to you.
baby baby,
goodnight and goodbye to you
you will come to see
maybe I was the one for you.
Baby, baby...
(welcome back to this place stay out of town and out of state, I don't ever want to see your face)
Baby baby...
(welcome back to this place stay out of town and out of state, I don't ever want to see your face)
baby, baby
(welcome back to this place stay out of town and out of state, I don't ever want to see your face)
baby baby
(welcome back to this place stay out of town and out of state, I don't ever want to see your face)
good night and goodbye to you
baby baby,
goodnight and goodbye to you.
you will talk to me
but I sure won't talk to you.
baby baby,
goodnight and goodbye to you
you will come to see
maybe I was the one for you. "
As much as i want to see you, i know that i shouldn't. and i cant. because at th end of th day, i'll hurt both of us.
End of my song lyrics... @ 2:24 PM
